Welcome to Raw is Marcella!

Eve Torres  is backstage with The Bella Twins. They are chatting about weather, which is a lovely conversation topic. The Twins ask about Ryder. Eve  laughs her lungs out of her.  They tell Eve he is a good guy. So she thinks they are telling jokes. Eve tells them that she is not friends with Ryder.  She made him think they were friends. She used him to get people talking about her.  Eve says he didn’t even get to first base (I didn’t know they played baseball. :P) She  calls him a child and says she will do what people do– use each other. Ms. Torres says she has the big fish hooked now and will use Cena. She tells Bellas to film her walking into Cena’s locker room. Bless, she turns around into Cena who has heard everything. OH NO! Cena walks away in disappointment as Eve freaks out.

Cena comes out to the ring, and before he can speak, Eve comes on down. She wants a minute to explain everything since it was taken out of context.  Cena says she’s been sipping the skank juice and wants to use her assets to further her career. Eve yells that they are friends. Cena says he lost a very good friend in Zack Ryder because of her being a hoeski. Eve says she was joking with the Bellas. Cena says The Rock and Eve are perfect for each other – they’re both scandalous bitches. Eve falls to the ground crying like a baby.

Cena tries to be a gentleman and help her up. However, HE IS ATTACKED! Yes, he was attacked by Eve with a huge and potential kiss whilst she cries. How scary! Officials come down to save Cena from the attack. He gets away from her and says he like to stay disease free. The officials play with Eve and bring her backstage.

Aksana and Kelly Kelly vs. The Bella Twins

Some time later, we come back from a commerical and we see Aksana and Kelly Kelly in the ring. They will face the Bella Twins.  The goodies are in control until the Bellas come back and do a TRICKY to Aksana!  Aksana  fights back and does  a scoop slam. She hits a weird ass  elbow drop thing for  a bad  near fall.  Bella hits a move on Aksana  and rolls out. The other Bella gets into the ring which brings out Kelly Kelly who is distracting the referee. With this the illegal Bella comes and there’s some good old fashion TWIN MAGIC!

She hits a Bella Buster for the pin on Aksana.  The Bella Twins yell losers at the goodies as K2  yells at Bellas and consoles Aksana.

Winners: The Bella Twins

Vickie Guerrero  helps Dolph to the ring for the big ass battle royal for #1 contendership of CM Punk’s WWE Title. She looks almost as dashing as Cody Rhodes.

In this match, I felt terrible for combatants since they mostly had bandages (like my husband, Cody Rhodes) and people got hurt. Wade Barrett seems to be injured trying to catch a Dolph (who should have kept his shirt tucked into his panties longer to help with that FLIGHT!).  It also looked like Kofi Kingston and Dolph Ziggler had bad falls. Dolph smacked his fat jaw on the announcer table.  Kofi kept trying to land on his feet like a cat.

I wish all these people the best of luck in their health because bless that was some scary stuff! Hopefully, no one was injured badly!