The world watched in shock as Kharma – real name Kia Stevens – made a surprise return at this past Sunday’s Royal Rumble. Many were left wondering when she popped her baby out, while others seemed to wonder if she was wrestling while pregnant (tisk tisk!). Put your fears to the side! It was announced on TMZ that the dominant diva has already given birth! Kharma and her fiance welcomed their little bundle of joy – a baby boy named Jamie! – on December 31st…. just under a month before making her royal return! Talk about dedication to her craft! We would like to send out a huge congratulations to the happy couple and their newest addition!

Welcome to my show, Raw! Well, I really shouldn’t claim something that Johnny Ace “runs”, but nevertheless, I will for fun.

We see and hear a promo telling us the later tonight we will have a Divas Title match up between The Notorious Eve and The Glamazon Beth Phoenix. 

Vickie Guerrero leads  Dolph Ziggler (on his leash) to the ring. If Vickie doesn’t him to the ring, Dolph will find his old pom poms from his Spirit Squad days and become distracted.  We do NOT want that to happen! Thank GOODNESS Vickie is here to GUIDE HIM! By the way,  WHAT IS UP WITH HIS JACKET/VAST THING? Who told him he could wear that small dead rodent to the ring? So as he faces the Viper Randy Orton, Vickie shouts and cackles everywhere.  Totally random blurb that you really don’t need to know and don’t care to know, I like saying BARRETT BARRAGE! Lisa Jane (LJ) has influenced me too much! :P Orton hits a superplex on the top rope as his snakey baby mating routine in order to get Vickie under his spell. Vickie wasn’t paying attention since she was probably sewing tiny panties together for Dolph to wear next week.  Dolphy loses so Vickie is very upset. Back to the drawing board for her!

We see a clip from last night when Kane went apeshit on Ryder and Cena. We see Eve’s best facial impression of that time Layla retired Michelle McCool and  Lay was so distraught.

What the Funk? Naomi and Cameron Lynn (in new weaves and attire– attire is still bad) come out and dance with Brodus Clay for lifetime. Brodus Clay annihilates Tyler Rex.  The announcers talk about dinosaurs. So then, Naomi and Cameron dance for another seventy years. Thanks for nothing! (That one is for you, MARC!!!!)

KONG OUT ALERT:  There’s no sign of Kharma yet.  It’s making The Royals VERY MAD!

 Line of the Night:  R-Truth: Little Jimmy is smiling like a Little Jimmy!

I thought I would never put a line of R-Truth’s in my coverage and say he amused me.  He amused me very much tonight. He would have AMUSED me more if he and Little Jimmy threw Cole into a garbage bin. Until that happens, R-TRUTH, YOUR CASE IS DISMISSED!

I wonder when David Otunga will get the picture that HE and HIS MUG are annoying and should GTFO! Thank you for your consideration IN THIS GRAVE MATTER!

The illusive squash match for the Divas Title is UP NEXT!

WWE Divas Title Match: Eve Torres vs. Beth Phoenix

Eve makes her daring entrance  looking like she is going cry and ask for her mommy. Then, Beth Phoenix makes her way out. She decides to  NOT have her headband match her outfit because she thinks she is that much of a badass. Unfortunately, she finds out that she is NOT a badass. We will get to that another day as that is a horse of a different *ROYAL* color.  So anyways, Eve beats Beth into a corner and goes apeshit. The referee admonished her.  So, Beth and Eve have a tea party for a hour. However, Eve gets nailed with a clothesline because she didn’t like how Beth baked the crumpets, made the tea, or how Beth was mismatching (rightfully SO!)  Beth hits the GLAMSLAM for the win.

Winner: Beth Phoenix

Kane appears on the titantron so Beth MAKES LIKE A TREE AND LEAVES! (That’s for you, Marc!) Kane is babbling to Eve who is NO SELLING the Glam Slam.  Kane is trying to be a professor of hate. I wasn’t paying attention since I was SO MAD! (Yes, mad like Daffney). Why was I mad? Well, Eve was cowering like an idiot and plus Beth legged it up the ramp like a weirdo as well.  So anyways, Kane appears behind Eve since she’s his newest victim. John Cena makes the save. He goes batshit all over Kane as Eve disappears. Good news is, Eve is alive. Bad news is, the Royals are ANGRY!

Kelly Kelly and Alicia Fox are backstage talking as Johnny is walking. They point and laugh at him. Apparently, they were dressed weird. I can’t say as I missed the entire 1 second thing as I was more interested in grabbing a lemon drop than seeing Johnny Ace walk. Sorry Foxy and Kellz! Better luck next time!

KHARMA MAKES A NO SHOW!  This does NOT excited us. We all want to see her “kong” out.  With antics like this, WWE doesn’t have  HAPPY BUNNIES in the form of the WWE UNIVERSE!

Mark my words, if there’s no Kharma on Smackdown, THERE WILL BE PROBLEMS!

Continue Reading… »

[Insert sexy and hot logo from Marc]

Welcome to the 25th Annual Royal Rumble!

We get a surprise in the form of an 8 diva tag match. Out come the heels all color coordinated in blue. Beth Phoenix (The Divas Champ), Natalya and the Bella Twins do their signature entrances. The faces, Kelly Kelly, Alicia Fox, Eve Torres, and Tamina make their way out there.  K2, Foxy, and Eve are wearing orange gear. Tamina must have not gotten the memo of being color coordinated at this event. However, she made up for it by having a wonderful hair style. What was she thinking?

Nattie and Tamina start  by slapping each other and stuff. Tamina chops Nattie several times, which made me giggle. She then HEADBUTTS Nattie, which probably made Marc squeal in his dreams.  Some stuff happens and Tamina tags in Eve. BOOTY POP EVE DROP occurs! Some more stuff happened and suddenly Nattie gets control. Eve gets backed up in the wrong part of town. Beth gets the tag.  Beth and Eve fight tooth and nail for three hours. Eve hits her fancy kick and then does her seated clothesline. I think she thinks she is an airplane. Eve goes for a senton and Beth gets her knees up. Bless!!!!!!! Beth and Eve play for a little bit until Brie Bella tags in. Brie chokes EVE on the ropes for fun. Oh dear, Eve gets kicked in the face. Brie does a fancy chinlock. Eve battles back and tags in Alicia. The Foxy One hits a clothesline and a pair of  one legged dropkicks.

Anyways, Alicia stomps on Brie for fun until the referee stops her. THAT IS NOT NICE! During Alicia’s detention,  the Bella Twins pull Twin Magic. Nikki gets into the ring into the corner. SNEAKY LITTLE BUGGER! Alicia gets smacked about until Kelly gets the tag.  K2 does her head scissors takedown as well as hits her back handspring elbow in the corner. Oops, she hits a bulldog on Nikki. K2 attempts a pin but Brie breaks it up.  Nattie and Eve play for a bit.  Then all the divas fight outside of the ring. K2 climbs to the top rope and hits a crossbody splash  on everyone and their mother. All divas are down! K2 grabs a Bella (don’t know who, don’t care who). I think it was Nikki. Suddenly, Beth smacks the Bella in the back to tag herself in since K2 is all wobbly.  Beth tells the Bella to get out of her ring. She hits the GLAMSLAM on K2 for the victory.

Winners: Beth Phoenix, Natalya and The Bella Twins

Beth then PMS all over the place. She sends evils to Nattie. The other Bella tries to celebrate but she sees Beth is MAD!  The heels celebrate.

In backstage land, Ryder is  throwing angry faces (not mad faces because only Daffney is mad).  He is throwing these angry faces at John Laurinaitis. Eve runs up and bitches  Johnny Boy out using BIG BAD WORDS! I will break it down for all of you. She basically said Laurinaitis is an IDIOT and  a JERK! She (and I) hope he is fired tomorrow night on my show, Raw. Laurinaitis says “that’s gratitude for ya” and walks off. Eve calls him an ass and wheels Ryder into his cage.

Cameron Lynn and Naomi help  Brodus Clay out. They dance for a year.  Drew McIntyre throws them kisses and gets squashed. The dance trio dance for another year. Thank you for coming!

Vickie Guerrero  helps Dolph Ziggler to the ring only to be thrown out by Johnny Ace several minutes later. She throws a fit so she should even though she wasn’t supposed to be out there.

Vickie comes out with Dolph, who returns to the Rumble match since he lost his previous match.

At entrant 21, the world gets a surprise, especially Michael Cole, who is dancing like FOOL. We hear a laugh that we all love.  Kharma  laughs and makes faces at Cole. She clotheslines Cole. Cole tries to make a like tree and leave (that’s for YOU MARC!) Booker and Lawler pull Cole off the apron to be eliminated. Ziggler tells Kharma to GTFO, so she implant busters him for shits and giggles. Vickie lays in the riot act on Kharma. Kharma starts towards Vickie and she decides discretion is the better part of valor. Thus, she leaves  Kharma ALONE! Huncio charges at Kharma, which is a big mistake. He must have taken his dumb pills this morning. Kharma tosses him over the top rope for fun. Ziggy comes from nowhere and dumps Kharma to the floor. She is eliminated.  Vickie cackles everywhere.

It was a nice Royal Rumble match. It was definitely not one of the best versions; however, it was enjoyable.  The PPV was decent enough to not get many tongue lashings from me. I was happy that the divas match got some air time. I’m definitely looking forward to my show, Raw! ;)

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Former WWE Diva Maryse Ouellet and boyfriend The Miz teamed up and joined the NOH8 campaign with a super-hot pictorial session. Check out the links below for Maryse’s photos.

• Maryse’s solo shot
• Maryse & The Miz’s shot

Maryse joins the likes of Maria Kanellis, Lilian Garcia and Brooke Hogan in the campaign against California Proposition 8.

Despite being majorly ill since my surgery, this brought a smile to my face today. Please enjoy the crazy antics of  Tara (then known as Victoria) and Ivory.

Congratulations are in order for TNA Knockout Rosita who recently scooped up PWI’s Inspirational Wrestler of the Year award.

TNA President Dixie Carter tweeted a picture of Rosita – real name Thea Trinidad – holding her award.

At the age of 20, Rosita is a former Knockout’s Tag Team Champion and has been improving her in-ring work over such a short space of time. She also appeared on Children of 9/11, as she lost her father at only 10 years old to the twin tower attacks in 2001. The fact that she continued to pursue her wrestling career is beyond inspirational and we’d like to congratulate Rosita for her achievement.

Welcome to Raw is Marcella!

We see Alicia Fox walking backstage as we learn she will face the unstoppable Beth Phoenix.

 The Foxy One and the Glamazon come to the ring.  Really, I don’t know what happened, I turned to my mother who gave me some pureed peaches. I saw Alicia do something and then  Beth Phoenix was  on the floor.  Fox hits her rolly polly leg drop HARD on Beth’s face for the win in this 3 second match.  I seen Beth roll out of the ring with a HUMONGOUS welt above her eye. Shiit! Anyways, Alicia grabs the microphone and does something dastardly! She hopes that everyone has a Foxy Holiday.

Rosa Mendes  helps Epico and Primo to the ring and they win. She dances and speaks Spanish everywhere. She was well pleased.

By the way, I heart Cody Rhodes.

The Bella Twins are backstage with John Laurinaitis and David Otunga.  The Sisters are being bad to each other. They are so MAD that Teddy Long was mean to them.  Mr. Creativity babbles but no one was listening. The Bellas kiss the cheeks of the disease.  Vickie Guerrero storms over all pissed and stuff and DEMANDS a rematch for Dolphy.  She gets so mad. Johnny tries to tell her that Hornswoggle is behind her.  The two have an exchange. Hornsy kisses Vickie under the mistletoe. SHE GETS LIVID!!!!!!! Everyone runs away. She tries to disinfect her mouth but to no avail.

Oh, we see  Vickie Guerrero help Dolphy to the ring for his six man match, where he teamed with Miz and Del Rio and lost to Daniel Bryan, CM Punk, and Zack Ryder. Bless.

[insert the sexy and hot logo Marc will eventually make for me when he has the time.  No pressure bro!]

Vickie Guerrero comes out in a MAD ugly dress and excuses all the stinky marks. Dolphy comes out in ugly metallic blue panties.  During the match, Vickie kept shouting. She even put Ziggy’s foot on the bottom rope. For this BAD behavior, she gets scolded by the referee. She is told to GTFO. She has a conniption.   Eventually, the WWWYKI man wins the US title, bro.

Alicia Fox is seen backstage with Booker T. OUT OF NOWHERE, my husband,  Cody Rhodes attacks the 5 time WCW champion (who really is a 6 time champ).

Rosa Mendes helps the cousin duo of Epico and Primo to the ring in their crushing lost against the champs, Air Boom. Bless, Rosa did the best job she could ever do! She danced and spoke Spanish.  Bless, Rosa’s so pretty.

Then we get treated to a Divas title match: Kelly Kelly vs. Divas Champ Beth Phoenix The Glamazon.

Beth comes to the ring and she is so going to be mad. K2 got this title for winning the Divalicious Slammy and clocking Beth with a slappypoo.  Beth wants K2 to slap her. So K2 doesn’t do it. Beth goes to slap K2, and K2 slap her. Beth get thrown outside. K2 leaps and does a Melina style head smasher. K2 applies the Candylicious on Beth.  Beth is really getting smacked about. Beth, suddenly, turns everything around.  She slams K2 into the match. There’s stomps, punches, and elbows along with a 2 count. Beth stands on K2 and the bottom rope.  K2 gets slammed and placed in a  camel clutch.  K2 does a bulldog and goes crazy on Beth. She climbs to the second rope and gets caught by Beth. Beth goes for two failed pin attempts. Beth goes to the top rope for a leg drop but misses. Beth  counter the K2 and goes for the Glam Slam. K2 rolls through but gets a 2 because Beth rolls through for a 2 count. Beth catches K2 on her shoulders and slams her face first with the Electric Chair for the win.

Beth Phoenix retains the Divas Title.

Vickie Guerrero helps Jack Swagger to the ring for his match against Sheamus. He loses and Vickie screams everywhere like a nice lady.

 Cody Rhodes and CM Punk were sexy and hot everywhere so I am a happy lady. (I saw Cody Rhodes three times!!!) Maybe,  WWE was trying to please me today since Ryder and Bryan are champions and Punkie and Rhodes retained.  I’m well pleased. I would have hate to have to scream at the WWE for idiocy and open up my stitches from my oral surgery. Thank you!

You’ve seen the festive commercials and now’s your chance to strut around like the Knockouts by winning the very t-shirts they wore. Or they could be a last-minute Christmas present, your choice.

These are the actual shirts worn by the Knockouts. Every shirt, except the Skull Dagger worn by Christy Hemme, is autographed by the Knockout who wore during the commercial shoot. Although Christy was unable to sign hers, I’m sure her DNA is on it somewhere.

Every shirt will include a certificate of authenticity.

The cheapest shirt – ODB‘s – is currently going for about $55, while the most expensive shirt – guess who? Velvet Sky! – is going for just over $400.

You can bid for a t-shirt here.